Legend of the Heart Race
As the goddess leaned against the old tree in the forest, the tree embraced her with its energy, a slight breeze rustling through its leaves sent tingles down her spine.
“Grandfather,” she said softly to the old patriarch, it's burnt trunk showing the battle scars of a forest fire survivor. "I am in such a quandary. I have come into this world to remember the pathway through to the portal that I might open it from the inside. Only then could we reestablish the energetic flow from our star as we come into alignment with it at the hub of the Stargate. It is then that the Stargate might open to our rightful alignment with the Life Force beyond this universe.”
The goddess relaxed back, allowing the weathered, fire scarred tree to take her into the alignment with the Web of Life.
"As I am one with you," The goddess continued, "you are one with me, as all creation is the interface of the physical world with the Non-material realm. I know that you hear me, Grandfather. Please tell me, what is it I need to know? Since leaving the realm of the Fairy World to venture into the land of the Too Bigs, I have found the distractions almost overwhelming. I have found the temptations of the world of consumers to be very alluring, and yet I stepped away to follow my deeper path unfolding. This I have done for I knew in the moment that I made the decision - I would die if I continued on the path of designer labels and Gucci bliss. I followed instead my true bliss, although most every step felt to be drawing me deeper into despair. Most of my journey could not be considered bliss, but I was determined to follow my point of fascination, which tumbled me deeper into that density. Here, at last, is where I found my true love. He had entered even deeper into the density to catch me as I was falling into deepening despair. Now you see, I am with my true love as I know he is the one in my heart, as I am in his. I am asked to give birth to the God King who is One Heart. So you see, Grandfather, I am being asked to do that which is beyond my knowing. I have nothing to follow but my own inner voice.”
A great gust of wind shook the branches high above. Shadows danced all about her.
“My inner voice is what guided me here, where the world of success sees me as dancing with the shadow. Every teacher I encountered on my journey at some point would say - you are going the wrong way. Explore the Unknown. Stay away from the Unknowable. And yet it was the Unknowable that called to me, and I would just step away from the teacher - entering the great shadow they cast even as they pulled others toward the Light. I descended further into the darkness. I am plagued with thoughts of the path unchosen, the easy glamorous life I could have led. It is the final temptation as The Withering still attempts to claim me with its forgetfulness by obscuring the significance of the path I follow. My path has now led me to you, Grandfather. I recognize you as the patriarch and therefore the portal that allows me to request that I might once again enter the Land of Magic and Dreams made Real. The Fairies have been unusually quiet as I crossed through the underworld. Pulling the Cloak of Omlah more tightly around me, protecting the heart of the child, I began to view myself as the crazy old crone that others scoffed at, tricked and mistreated, all the while misunderstanding the deeper motive that I, as the Star Goddess, must carry out to pass the Test of Time. Along the way, the Cloak of Omlah took all of the slings and arrows, the rocks that were hurled by the unknowing Earthlings I had come to save. Until now, the reflection I see is one of an old woman who has done nothing in this world but accumulate battle scars as she tried to survive while cut off from my true alignment with the star as I fell to Earth so many many eons ago. If I release the cloak and let my heart shine forth, the child will feel such sadness in the world. But the innocent heart of the child also feels great love for the world.”
Grandfather's deep knowing rumbled through the goddess as she softly patted the gnarled trunk that seemed to hold her with tender compassion of a wise elder comforting an innocent heart.
“You are the one who came to open the portal allowing the opening of the Stargate that pulls the whole world into alignment with our highest future unfolding. Do not despair of the beliefs in the dualistic world. All now is the future in black-and-white, light and dark - seen as good and evil. You are bringing the dark into ever expansion to bring in the Infinite Light. This is giving birth to the God King. He is borne in your heart. Open to the Infinite Love that is the merging of the physical world with the Nonmaterial realm. You are the new template of the balance of the Divine masculine with the Divine feminine, as the Light is welcomed into the ever expanding infinite Non-existence - the dark womb of emerging life.”
The goddess felt the shivers of Truth from the energy the patriarch transmitted through her spine as she leaned against the old tree.
"Thank you, Grandfather. I received your wisdom as the transmission from the Higher Civilization that is calling me forth. It is for me to remember, to awaken, and to carry on with the mission for which I have incarnated in this existence.”
The embryo floating in the dark womb was shown to her as fractal patterns of the Golden ratio unfurling in an exacting rhythm.
“You are feeling the inner impulse of evolution. We are evolving this species by incarnating deeper into the genetic coil. We, of the Celestial Realm, are the indigenous beings, for it is our seeding, one and a half billion years ago, that allows the unfolding to the Higher Civilization - one and a half billion years into the future. We are the advanced race that is calling you forth. As you are the goddess that received the prompting to follow the stars in your heart, you are the one who received the ancient knowledge delivered to you as a gift to your world. These ancient scrolls have been in your care-taking. They have guided you in your inward journey to find the portal in the heart. Opening it from the inside was the task for which you had to withstand the Test of Time. It is acknowledging this, that is giving you the greatest difficulty. For you to acknowledge the Test of Time, you will be flooded with the memories of fear, isolation, uncertain success and many failures along the way. No one knew if you could make it through the deep density. Civilizations have been wiped out. Collective memories we're lost as the population had to restart several times. As was the case with the ancient Egyptians, we were able to interface at a high enough level as to transpart the knowledge of mathematics and other skills. However, unless we could prove to be the indigenous beings, we were limited in our interaction. The destructive forces now on the planet are the disruptive element that consumes the resources of the planet without regard for the conscious being of the world. The planet is viewed at those stages as a rotting fruit that is being consumed. However, as the indigenous beings that first seeded this world with our advanced race, it is encoded within all lifeforms. We received confirmation that the Celestial Realm recognizes our claim of this world as our home planet. As such, it is now being brought into alignment with our advanced knowing. You are instrumental in this process for you have found the portal by innovating a new pathway. Now our frequency is activated within you to hear and receive our transmission through the fractal antenna of the genetic coil. The reason it is difficult for you to accept this is the fear of failing - the fear of forever being trapped in a tomb of density, unable to return home - is so strong for it is the fear of very real danger that you must acknowledge. If you ignore the fear, it does not go away. Only by feeling it completely and releasing it can you claim the courage that you had called upon to enter into the sarcophagus. Fully realize the Test of Time was to go 1 1/2 billion years deeper into the density of the coil and awaken, remembering who you are and why you have come into this dense world. The courage you returned with was even greater, for the original path was blocked, trapping the Divine Feminine from returning to our home world. The queen of each preceding house had fallen ill and succumbed to The Withering. You have survived. You return to us. You were given the directive - Go with courage, return with love. Go with love, return with courage. Call on all your courage now to deeply feel the truth of your greater existence on our side of the portal. Here, you are home. You are the first queen to survive The Withering. We celebrate your return. Welcome home.”
The Pool of Wonder
The deep awakening within the goddess of the true nature of her Being and why she had entered into the earth plane existence, moved her to a new level of self acceptance. Walking slowly through the forest, the feelings of sadness for the world were releasing as she felt the deep peace of being one with the Forest. At last she came upon a clear pool, formed by the rocks in the icy mountain stream. She quietly sat in contemplation. It was almost dusk before the first fairies and gnomes appeared to her.
“She doesn't seem to be leaving anytime soon," the goddess heard them whisper, "we will convene our gathering in the usual manner,” they concluded, ignoring her presence. However, when they realized that she could see and hear them, they were more than a little surprised.
"Could it really be her? Is she real? Is she the star goddess that fell into Fairyland so long ago. Has she indeed made her way back to us?”
Suddenly the whole pool of wonder seemed to glisten and sparkle in the new found excitement.
“Is she the one?“
She heard the whispered inquiry answered by a rather rotund old gnome of assumed authority.
"There is only one Goddess in all the Realm who would dare to make her way through the underworld and return with full knowledge of her mission here on earth. Our Brethren and Fairies befriended her as they came upon the shooting star, falling into Fairyland. Dazed and disoriented, this star goddess announced that she had come to give birth to humanity, as this world was the home planet of her star system. The Fairies helped her learn of the Nonmaterial Realm here on earth and how we interface only minimally with the world of the Too Bigs, so named for their oversized consumption of the physical world from which they were made”.
"For you to complete your mission", the Fairies had advised," you will need to venture into the physical world before they consume all the resources on which we of Fairyland also depend. Here on this planet of duality, we of the Nonmaterial Realm, hold the key to the unfolding Web of Life. The Too Bigs are the only species that believe they are separate from the Web. They are thus poisoning their water, poisoning their food supply. It is the physical world that sickens from the parasitic action. We of the Nonmaterial Realm have complete knowledge as to restoring the Web of Life. But we of simultaneous time, have no action in the physical world. For you to make the greatest impact on the genetic coil, you must enter into their world from the origin. You must enter as a Too Biglet. Mind you, this path is fraught with danger as many of our Fairy children have been lured into the physical world. You will recognize them by their aura, slightly pointed ears and elfin qualities. Many have forgotten who they are, intrigued as they are in the world of distraction. You must enter as a child and remember who you are, moving beyond all distraction to return to us in full knowing. It is then that we of the Non-material Realm will assist you in birthing humanity. And in so doing, our hope is that you will awaken the Elfin children who have been captured by the fabled Pokémon.
“How shall I enter into the physical world to more deeply affect the genetic coil?” The Star Goddess asked of the Fairies that had taken her in. “If I enter as a child in their world, the forgetfulness might be overwhelming. If I enter as an adolescent, the distractions of duality might overwhelm my sensibilities. I must enter a virgin who has not known the touch of man such that the greater devotion to the Great Creator may be the only pull that I will feel and follow.”
“And yet,” the Fairies had assured her, “if you do not enter the world as a Toobiglet, born into existence as a child, the loneliness and isolation your Star Being will feel may cause you to succumb to the Withering.”
"You know of The Withering?" the Star Goddess asked, surprised that the Fairies would have this knowledge.
"It is within our Fables to know of the cycles. We know there have been 11 cycles on this planet of the great light, followed by great darkness. Each time your blue white star approaches our yellow sun, the Light increases on our world. But such is the nature of our duality that as Light increases, so too, does the shadow. The Light is split into light and dark in the masculine nature of existence. Thus the light and dark are experienced as good and evil. The feminine nature is suppressed and unable to return to the Nonmaterial Realm where we maintain the balance with the physical world.” they explained.
“What is the cause of The Withering?” the Star Goddess asked. “From the highest realm it is known that the queen of each successive house the precession passes through, falls ill and fades from existence on the Star Realm. There is no cure as no one knows why it strikes the queen. The king is left untouched yet devastated at the loss of his true queen. Our realm is left distorted and unbalanced as the masculine attempts to rule but cannot sustain life. The colony collapses. I entered into your planet in an attempt to escape The Withering. At the time the two stars orbits fall away from each other, is the beginning of dusk on your world. The Stellar Beings that had been visiting here return to our home star. Mysteriously, the queen is seen to grow pale as if dragged into the descending darkness of this planet. No one knows why. It is as if the feminine never returns at the start of the dusk, but is trapped in the deepening darkness as the portal is closed by the unaligned stellar orbits. It is the true queen who reopens the portal at the Dawn of a new alignment. But as the Light increases on your world, the queen begins to fade from ours. I am the last Queen of the 12 houses. As the portal was about to close, I begged the King to allow me to enter earth plane existence. He was mortified by the prospect of my remaining on a world of descending darkness.
"If I do nothing, I too, will succumb to The Withering. It is only a matter of time. Therefore, I will insert deeper into time as the Time Master from the highest realm. I can return to you then, beyond Time Space. We will be united in Eternity. “
"To do so, you must withstand the Test of Time. The risk is too great," the King lamented. "I may lose you forever. I cannot bear the thought of you wandering alone in the darkness, losing all knowing of the Queen that you are.”
"If we do nothing, you will lose me most certainly. No one knows what happens to the previous queens who have already faded from our realm,” the Queen replied.
"It is unlikely that your high vibration can withstand the deep darkness of stellar winter on that world. It is too great a risk.” The King bent his head into his hands, great sobs of desperation shaking his resolve. “You cannot ask me to let you undertake such a grave mission.”
Moved by his emotion, but not unsettled in her resolve, the Queen replied,
“It is our only hope. While I greatly respect your opinion, I am not asking your permission. I will go to the end of Time to return to you forevermore.”
“There is a way”, the Fairies said, “to enter into a virgin who is devoted to the great Creator God. The worship of the goddess, before it was suppressed by the patriarchy in the time marked by the Great Calling In of Inanna.
"But if I enter into a time just as the goddess rituals are suppressed, I will likely be distorted with the masculine energy going out of balance. Even a virgin must grow in the capacity to receive the true light of the Creator God. There is a way”, said the Star Goddess, “I must enter deeper into the coil than any have gone before. I must awaken with full awareness of the first seeding from our Realm. It is there that we will reestablish the balance of the Divine Feminine and the Divine Masculine. I will monitor the time before I enter. I will commune with the young virgin so that she will know her fate and therefore have a choice in fulfilling her role.”
Alone in her room of no more than bed and candle, a small intricate tapestry for a prayer rug on the dirt floor, the young woman, not much more than a girl, stared at the bright blue white light that had entered her room. The glow lit the room as if by full moon. She caught her breath as she felt such a loving Presence that awakened a knowing within her.
"You are the Goddess I am to embody.” The young girl heard herself speak out loud, quite surprising herself with the knowing that filled her senses wordlessly. "You are the one that the High Priests are preparing for.”
The young girl collapsed to her knees bowing before the Presence of the glow as she repeated the words she had been trained to say.
“It is such a great honor to be bestowed on one so young, as I am especially prepared for the coming great day. The ceremonial mound is readied, I too, am complete in my devotion to you and to the great Creator God,” the young girl said.
“Rise”, the soft voice of the Star Goddess commanded. “Do not allow yourself to be the pawn in a game played by the priests who have gotten intoxicated on the power seized from the Goddess”.
“But it is the Goddess that I am devoted to, in this I am complete.” The young girl had entered the Temple as a small child, taken from her parents, to be especially prepared. Her parents, along with all the villagers, knew of the ceremony - the calling upon the goddess - that was enacted every 10 years. They had witnessed the last ceremony. Her mother screamed in anguish as her small child was ripped from her arms by the father.
“It is an honor," her father stoically repeated to the priest as he handed over his daughter.
Looking up into the blue white glow in her room, Iana, as the priests called her, saw her mother’s anguished face before her. The pain of being separated at such a young age was a deep wound of unbearable sadness that she poured into her devotion to the Goddess, her true mother. Suddenly the anguish, despair, and sadness poured out of her in deep heaving sobs. The longing of true connection with the mother was felt intensely as if her heart would burst.
The intensity of emotion was tangible to the Star Goddess as she interfaced with the physical world in Iana’s room. The cry of a small child, lost and alone, called to her through the veil. She imagined stroking the soft curls of the toddler that had grown up in this room, ripped from her mother's arms, betrayed by her father to pay homage to the distorted priests. But as a small child, Iana knew not of the distortion for she did only as she was told, devoting herself to contemplation and prayers. The hollowness in her heart was filled with calling in the Goddess. This she had been trained to do. She was also trained in the ancient art of scrying - looking into a mirror or pond to see the reflected pictures arising from the other side of the veil. An apt student, she had quickly become an adept. Thus it was that the pictures now appearing before her were disturbing in their intensity.
“This cannot be true,” Iana called out, still sobbing on the dirt floor. “The priests cannot be planning to destroy the Goddess they call upon. It cannot be all pretense to serve their evil purpose.” She immediately felt a stabbing pain in her heart remembering as her father tore her from her mother and handed her over to the waiting priest. Clinking coins echoed in her ears. Her father tightened his fist around the silver as he relinquished the hold on his daughter.
Lalillia, Queen of the Fairies, called upon the Star Goddess. Although informal, a Royal visit nonetheless.
"My Royal Advisers inform me that you are a queen in your realm, quite as I am the queen in mine,” Lalillia softly said. "I trust that you have been well treated as we honor all Star Beings that fall into our Realm. This is wondrous news to us that indeed you are royal on your dimension as well. Tell me, why is it that you have entered this deep density, and now proclaim that you must enter even deeper still?”
Talking to the soft presence of the Fairy Queen that seemed to float as it also flitted around the room, the Star Goddess offered only one thought,
“The Withering in our Nonmaterial spirit realm of fairies, divas, elves and gnomes is known to effect those of our world who ventured into the physical world and failed to return to us. It is unknown what is the true cause, whether the Forgetfulness is due to the deep density being unable to hear and respond to our high-frequency with which we communicate; or if the distraction of the world distorts the innate knowing of the Elfin heart of children. The stories that are told of us are relayed as make believe. We are portrayed as cartoon characters. Thus our children lose the internal call that would guide them home. It is quite similar to how the physical world holds the possibility of a Star Goddess falling into the physical world. It is quite impossible to the limited understanding of the dense physical world with no true comprehension of the Non-material Realm. But you see in the world, all is considered myth that refers to the goddess. The patriarch, the victor of the war systematically waged against the sacred feminine, now tell the story to their liking. All the world religions currently tell the story of God who creates life. The Feminine is seen only as a peripheral player and certainly not as a Divine presence”, said Lalillia.
"The betrayal I experienced as I became present in the memory of the young girl taken from her mother and sold by her father, is the imbalance that has perpetuated on this world even unto this day. I must return to the origin of the betrayal to release it from the genetic coil if I am to return the Goddess to her rightful glory.”
"This is indeed a serious undertaking,” Lalillia agreed, “why would you attempt such a thing when you exist on a High Realm of which I can only imagine your world.”
"It is precisely because of the great love I have for the King of my realm that I cannot bear to see him suffer. The Withering affects our world, but it is only the queen that fades, never to return. If I had stayed and done nothing, I would be torn from his arms in the slow insidious draining of life force. Since I am the last queen, the Council of Twelve would be as wizards grown quite wizened, having not the magic to create life without a true queen. The collapse of our colony would be complete. We had tried hiding, sequestering, guarding, camouflaging, separating the queen. But to no avail. The queen who had never entered the physical world was none the less pulled into the deepening darkness, never to return. The only possibility that we had not attempted was to have the queen go into the very seeding of our advanced race in an attempt to reset the rhythm of the genetic coil before it becomes unbalanced. Since I was the one to see it, I was the one to do it. I must enter alone into the physical world with the hopes that I can reset the rhythm and find the portal to return home.”
You are not alone in seeing the wisdom,” Lalillia said," I, too, see the possibility in a nearly impossible task. For our Non-material Realm is inextricably linked with the physical world unbalanced by the greed of man stripping the resources with utter disregard for our realm that maintains life. If nothing is done, it is foreseen that I too, will fade as surely as the queen bee is disoriented causing the colony collapse. It is already being witnessed in their world, yet nothing is being done to stop it.”
"Yes," the Star Goddess nodded," we have monitored you're unfolding civilization to observe. This is the crucial time that we might affect most beneficial change.”
"Then I shall enter with you,” declared Lalillia.
"You mustn’t! It is far too dangerous!" The Star Goddess cried out.
"As it is for you, Star Goddess - unknown to this world. But you see, I too, see the possibility, a hope that our Non-material Realm will not collapse but will thrive. Since I am the one to see it,” Lalillia said boldly, “then I am the one to do it. I shall enter and find my way through to you, and that I shall be of service to you opening the portal.”
"No Lalillia," the Star Goddess said slowly, “it is quite impossible for you to accompany me into the density. Your fairy wings will be torn asunder. You will not survive where I go. And furthermore, I need you here in the Non-material Realm to keep contact. You will be able to observe my progress and be my ally, should I be fortunate enough to awaken from the deep sleep. Tell me that you will watch over me and guide me with the wisdom of the world unfolding as the Web of Life.”
A shimmer of disappointment flitted through the air as the Queen of the Fairies recognized the wisdom the Star Goddess offered.
"While I see your point of view", Lalillia said slowly, “it is with great trepidation that I release you to travel alone into the underworld. There, you will have no allies, save I, who will indeed guide you. The Gnomes and Elves have also agreed to do whatever they can to protect you on your journey. Mind you, we have no action in the physical world save that performed at our bidding by those capable of hearing. Be aware that we will speak to your heart as we do with all the Fairy children. And as we instruct all children, listen to your heart whisper. Feel into the deeper knowing that is prompting your heart. I will be here upon your return to our world and assist you in your return to your realm.”
"Thank you, Lalillia. I return now to the young girl who calls to me, not as the virgin adept but as the small child, lost and alone.
The blue white light entered the small room where the toddler was lying on the prayer rug, crying herself to sleep. Only sleep did not come. Pulling the tattered blanket tightly about her in hopes of shutting out the light of another day spent crying for a mother who would not come to comfort her, the soft blue white light penetrated her, easing the sorrow. Tentatively, she peaked out at the strange cold dark world.
Reaching through the veil with all the love in her heart, the Star Goddess, comforted the Toddler as best she could. The child relaxed into the soft glowing light, more curious than afraid.
“Mama,” the child softly uttered over and over. The Star Goddess could quickly see why the Virgin Adept that this child would grow to be, would be completely devoted to calling in the Goddess. Doing the bidding of the priests was secondary to the love the little girl felt as her only source of comfort while curled up on a prayer rug. The heartbreak the child had experienced at such a tender age created a deep trauma within her genetic coil.
“I found my way back to you by following the deep imprint in the coil, but it is not right that you suffer so. I shall call on my allies to create a Fairy Ring. In this, I can keep you safe, even as I go deeper.
" Lalillia,” the Star Goddess called to the forest. Immediately the fairy queen flitted into view.
"It is possible, what you ask," Lalillia said, having been observing the Star Goddess with the child. “However, if we are successful in creating a Fairy Ring to communicate with your Star Realm, it may not be stable for you to pass through. It may send you deeper into the density.
"My plan precisely", the only answer from the Star Goddess.
Deep in the forest the fairies, gnomes, and elves, convened. It has been aeons since a great Fairy Ring of this magnitude had been attempted. It would take all of their combined magic, along with the divas of the plant kingdom, to bridge to the Star Realm.
An inquisitive baby girl crawled about a grassy area near some trees, her mother hanging wash on the line nearby. Attempting to stand, her toes curled around the grass could not keep her upright for long. Toppling over in the soft grass, she fell nose first in the clover. There, a dewdrop caught her eye. It sparkle as if the sun had been caught inside. The sparkle of the jewel in the grass called to her curiosity. She looked closer at the tiny star inside the bubble of water. Remaining absolutely motionless as time stood still, the child was pulled into the Fairy Ring. The elves gave a great cheer as she appeared, held in the arms of the Star Goddess as the portal opened to the Higher Realms. The vibration danced across the sky like a great Aurora Borealis. The Star Goddess and the child appeared to disappear, then reappear as if flickering between realms. Great streaks of lightening flashed around them causing the fairies to fly and the gnomes to hold their ground.
"I returned to you, only in this moment", the Star Goddess declared to the realm from which she had descended. “The child is pure and innocent love, the secret encoding I carry into the world shall be kept in her heart.
Streaks of magenta and cobalt blue flash about like great waves of vibration.
"You have brought the child through to our dimension but with dyer consequences. In an effort to protect her, you must take her place.
"Yes", she said slowly. "I am aware of descending, for it is my plan to go even deeper into the genetic coil where the seeding of the Heart Race made the evolvement of intelligent life possible on this planet. But my observations of earthlings thus far is that they have not developed the level of intelligence needed to turn the corner on the next evolutionary coil that allows our Heart Race to evolve into the future of this species. I therefore, will descend into the density of one and a half billion years to bring our future into alignment by restoring the rhythmic pulse that encodes the Heart Race. It appears the rhythm was deeply disturbed and possibly lost at the time the Goddess worship was suppressed at the rise of the patriarchal religions. This may in some way contribute to The Withering. The Divine Feminine was all but lost and then aggressively suppressed.
The bright light of the King radiated in her heart as she felt him drawing near, reaching for her. She hands to him the baby.
"Keep the child in your heart, she will return me to you." And with that this Star Goddess was seen to flicker and fade.
In the Fairy Ring, the gnomes and elves still held the circle where a toddler pushed herself unsteadily upright, unfamiliar as yet with operating as a Toobiglet. The density of the physical world weighed heavily upon the Star Goddess. She began to lose conscious awareness of her true nature, left to survive as the child about to be torn from her mothers arms, betrayed by her father.
Alone in an austere, dirt floored room, the small child was quickly losing knowledge of her stellar origins. The naming of the child was the first official act of the High Priest towards the preparation for her upcoming role.
"I have asked the name that the little one brings”, the priest bellowed to his fellow monks. Ignoring the name given by her mother, the priest instead pray for a suitable name for a virgin who would one day embody a goddess.
"Iana is the name she shall be known forevermore.”
Iana grew with a few boys that were brought in as orphans and raised as monks. Never again to see her parents or outside the walls, her small tapestry prayer rug was the only touchstone to the Star Realm and the remembrance of her origin as the Star Goddess. She felt every bit of that pain a child feels torn from its mother. Lost, alone, isolated, crying herself to sleep each night. Yet the Star Goddess knew it was the only way to heal the deep trauma by giving in it even deeper meaning. Iana had moments of remembering the Fairy Ring and the colored lights that vibrated through her.
“Dragons", as they were known to her," I am supposed to fly with the dragons”, she told the priests as she pointed to the mandalas painted on the monastery walls.
Thunder rolled overhead, the sky darkened. The Fairy Ring dissipated. The Star Goddess, now a child, faded from view.
"How ever she will make her way back to us, is a wonder,” Lalillia said.
In the density of a physical form of a Toobiglet is difficult enough, but now she is entrapped within the confines of the priesthood who mean to capture the Goddess and squelch the worship of her. If they discover she is already contained within the designated receptacle, they will surely harm the child. If they have no knowledge, there is no one to reflect the heart of the Star Goddess back to her. She will fall to the Forgetfullness.
Growing up in a monastery was not that difficult for Iana. She had the orphans as occasional companions although they scorned her ability to see the fairies and divas and to talk to flowers.
"Crazy, you are so crazy", the boys taunted her, “there is no one there, you're talking to no one. You have to stop talking to flowers, that's crazy."
Iana, as a child, wanted so to fit in and be liked. However, Iana as the Star Goddess had a deeper yearning for connection to the Non-material realm. Being alone for much of her time when not being instructed by the priests, she was left to stroll the gardens in quiet contemplation. She never stopped talking to the flowers and fairies. She just stopped telling anyone that she did.
There was a deeper knowing alive within her of the mission she came into the physical world to accomplish.
“I will go deeper into the coil to imprint the code that it might unfold to our Heart Race.” She announced to the priests assuming they knew of this race. They laughed at her inquisitive nature, always asking questions to which there were no answers.
"Do not fret about your heart", she was told. "Focus only on the love of God.”
This is of course translated to - Love God the way we tell you. All else is frivolous nonsense.
As she grew, the Forgetfulness was ever present, insidiously draining her childhood wonder. She stop asking questions her heart wanted to know and did only as she was told. On the surface, she managed well enough to not be a bother or concern to others. But as she grew into a young woman, so to did the yearning in her heart for union with her true love. Her childhood playmates now kept away, as if she were tainted by the mysterious moon disease.
A deeper yearning of a magical mystical union of the physical world with the Non-material realm called to her, kept alive by the fairies and divas in the garden.
"However shall he find me,” she sighed," if I am never to see the outside world?”
"He will find do you where you live,” the hummingbird said.
"Here, alone in the garden?”
"Here. Still in your heart.”